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1:00 am - January 13, 2004
OK so I took a day off from work so I could finish up my homework. Er well I didn't finish it. I napped and watched vintage 80's movies on HBO like TEEN WITCH! I LOVE that movie! I'm gonna be the most popular girl... HEEHEE!!

*Yawnz* I'm almost tempted to take another day off from work. *Ponderz*

I got some bad news yesterday from my mom. My grandpa back home is in the hospital with pneumonia. I'm mad as hell because the doctors back home suck ass and I don't think they are taking good care of him. I wish they would send him to San Antonio but they say he's too old. WTF. It's like they just write him off because he's 92 years old. FUCK THAT! They also told my mom that "his cancer in his lungs is back because they saw spots in his chest xray." HELLO DUMB FUCK DOCTOR! YOU NEED TO DO A BIOPSY BEFORE YOU CAN TELL SOMEONE IT'S FUCKING CANCER! I tried to tell my mom that there is no way he ever had lung cancer before because there is no way he would be alive today if he did. The spots could be the pneumonia or even gas. Fucking doctors back home piss me off so bad. I cried because I feel so helpless and it sucks that I can't do anything for him. I don't know what I would do if I lost my grandpa. I can't handle anymore death in my family. I just don't deal well with it at all. My father in law isn't doing too good either. The doctor is basically putting him on morphine to make him confortable now. He's dying from complications of emphysema. It killed me to see him suffering when we were down there for Christmas. When I asked him how he was doing he said, "oh well I'm just wasting away here.." I've known this man for 4 years and after seeing him suffer so much I swear I'll never smoke another cigarette as long as I live...

Well now that I'm all depressed again...I'm going to go watch a movie. Fuck my homework...I'm not in the mood anymore...

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